Breadcrumbing Because Ghosting Wasn't Bad Enough

Breadcrumbing Because Ghosting Wasn’t Bad Enough

Breadcrumbing Because Ghosting Wasn't Bad Enough

At least when having been ghosted, you know that there is no hope because the person is gone. Well there is a new phenomenon called breadcrumbing, which you don’t really know what to think. According to Urban Dictionary, breadcrumbing is”When the “crush” has no intentions of taking things further, but they like the attention. So they flirt here or there, send dm/texts just to keep the person interested, knowing damn well they’re staying single.”

I was recently breadcrumbed for about two weeks, not realizing what was happening. The last time he blew me off I called him out on it. He gave a lame apology, expecting me to jump on it. I didn’t respond. I never heard from him again. This from a 42 year old “man”. A “man” I texted with from first thing in the morning until I fell asleep at night. So I did what any person with self respect would do.

via GIPHY

So whether it be a person who is narcissistic, seeking constant validation and attention even if they have no intention to commit to anyone. Or, a person who may just want to keep all of their options open, always looking for something better. You need to realize the game and get out! These selfish and inadequate people are not something you need in your life. Tell them to:

via GIPHY

At the end of the day, of course it hurts to have been breadcrumbed. But just think, you actually lucked out. You avoided getting involved with a self involved, selfish, emotionally void person. You will continue to be fabulous, and they will continue to be emotionally empty. Celebrate your fabulous self and be grateful.

via GIPHY

So now that you know what breadcrumbing is, stay tuned for how to tell if you are being breadcrumbed and how to handle being breadcrumbed. Also check out The Epidemic Of Ghosting http://www.fabulouslysingle.life/the-epidemic-of-ghosting/
Until next time……

 

Safety Harbor Spa

Safety Harbor Spa

Safety Harbor Spa

Have you ever just needed to unplug from the world and recharge? Well, The Safety Harbor Spa is the perfect place for you. There is no better place to unwind and practice self-love all day. The safety harbor spa offers a 50,000 square foot spa and fitness center and so much more.

When visiting the spa, you will first receive a robe and a locker key. Once you get them you will walk through a door that leads to the spa. Tranquility hits you right a way. In the women’s locker room there is a lounge to relax, fresh lemon water, tea and coffee. Soft music plays in the background. Once you change into your robe you are ready to go.

Directly outside of the locker room you will find steam rooms, sauna, and a natural spring water pool. If that isn’t enough there is also two other natural spring water pools, whirlpools, and a fitness center. You get all day access to all of this if you book even just one service. But why settle for just one? Go to their website and check out their daily deals. https://www.safetyharborspa.com/en-us/spa-fitness/spa-daily-deals

Safety Harbor Spa

Safety Harbor Spa

This is the bath area. This picture is from one of my visits a few years ago. They have updated this area so that all baths are in private rooms.

I try to go once a year. The list of services offered is large and diverse. Facials, massages, and body treatments oh my. From personal experience, I can tell you that the facials, massages, herbal wraps, and the Espiritu Springs Mineral Bath are all fantastic options. They offer a plethora of services for men as well.

In between services you can head up to the main restaurant in your robe. It might seem odd at first, but it is really quite nice. The menu is vast and the food is wonderful. Make sure that you bring your appetite.

Safety Harbor SpaSafety Harbor Spa

Customer service is the best I have ever seen. The spa manager Heather Blake was fabulous. She went above and beyond to make my visit perfect. When talking to her, you will feel like you are old friends.

You couldn’t ask for a more perfect location. The spa is located at the end of Main St. Main St is literally covered with remarkable bars, restaurants, art galleries, bookstores and more.

Disconnecting from everything is so beneficial and much needed. When visiting the Safety Harbor Spa I turn my phone off. No talking, texting or social media. I do bring a book to read while eating. Serenity guaranteed!

You can go for the day or spend the weekend. Check out The Safety Harbor Spa!

 

https://www.safetyharborspa.com/

 

Until next time….

 

 

 

 

My Overachiever Attitude Is Really Insecurity

My Overachiever Attitude Is Really Insecurity

My Overachiever Attitude Is Really Insecurity

For as long as I can remember, being good enough is something I have struggled with. Being pretty enough, being smart enough, being liked enough, all things I never believed that I was. Damage from childhood and past relationships continued to make me doubt myself. I have journeyed for the past three years to overcome this mindset. As I continue on my journey I have realized that my overachiever attitude is really insecurity.

Due to my crippling insecurity, I work ten times as hard as most in order to not just get accilades, but more importantly to avoid criticism. Criticism, even constructive criticism can be debilitating to someone with low self esteem. I was the fastest moving up manager at a restaurant that I used to manage. When I decided to go back to school, I graduated with my Bachelor’s Degree on President’s List. While these are all accomplishments to be proud of, I find myself obsessing over my successes so I do not fail.

Of course this sounds good in theory, but at what expense? This overachiever attitude leads to an extremely high stress level and a limited work to personal time ratio. I find that this overachiever attitude also pertains to my friendships, family relationships, and romantic relationships. Always trying to please everyone, I often find myself exhausted and not truly happy. Yet, my insecurity and the thought of angering others, it has always been easier not to say no. Granted, I feel like this is a trait many women have, always wanting to make others happy.

My overachiever attitude really being insecurity was a hard pill for me to swallow. However, realizing what the ugly truth is, allows me to work on changing it. Now don’t get me wrong, I will never be good with criticism and not caring what others think. I will be able to not make myself crazy by overachieving to offset my insecurities.

Without acknowledging it, facing it, and changing it, my insecurity will always be masked by my overachiever attitude.

 

Until Next Time…

BEGIN LOVING YOURSELF. A heart with the word love on top of an open journal

HOW TO BEGIN LOVING YOURSELF 5 EASY STEPS

BEGIN LOVING YOURSELF. A heart with the word love on top of an open journal
Like anything worthwhile in life, learning to love yourself will take work. Self-love is not a switch that can be turned on and off. It took me time, effort, and dedication to learn to love myself. Everyone has their own baggage, so there is no cookie cutter answer for everyone. I can only share what I have experienced and what has worked for me. With this in mind, hopefully my experience will help you to begin loving yourself too. So, let’s see how to begin loving yourself 5 easy steps.

Learning to love yourself, the first part of that is LEARNING. So the only way to learn is to have a teacher, a guide, or something to help show you the way. Everyone needs help, we just need to be brave enough to let our guard down to accept it.

THERAPY:
  •   Therapy – The first step I had to take to learning to love myself was going to therapy. This is much scarier and more difficult than one would think. I am an expert at keeping up my defenses. So I had to grit my teeth, make an appointment, and my journey began. Therapy was essentially my first step onto the journey of learning to love myself. Due to the stigma attached to therapy, this might make some uncomfortable. There is no shame in therapy whatsoever.
    In addition to talking to my therapist and learning from her, she referred several books to me. These books changed my life. Not only did they help me to love myself, but helped me to improve relationships I had with my family.
SELF-HELP BOOKS:
  •  The Four Agreements: A Practical Guide to Personal Freedom – Although it was a little difficult to get into in the very beginning, it really helped me in my outlook and relationships with those around me.

  •  The 5 Love Languages: The Secret to Love that Lasts – This is not just a book for those in relationships or trying to be in a relationship. Absolutely wonderful book.

  •  You Are a Badass: How to Stop Doubting Your Greatness and Start Living an Awesome Life – The title alone is empowering and got my attention. Great read.

WRITING/JOURNALING:
<>
  • Journal – I am a firm believer in journaling. Writing about things I am grateful for, goals that I have, things that I have accomplished, and experiences that I have gone through help me to better appreciate my life and myself. This helps me to feel grateful, proud of myself, and work through certain issues I have with things I have gone through. Journaling will absolutely help you in the process to love yourself.
AFFIRMATIONS:
  • Affirmations – Sigh, eye roll. Yes, I said it, affirmations. I used to hate when people would tell me this. One day I got a wild hair to really work on being more positive and changing my life. When getting ready in the morning and before going to bed at night, I began listening to positive affirmations. You know what? I started to see a difference in my attitude and my life. You can find FREE affirmation videos to listen to on YouTube. This is one of my favorite morning affirmations to listen to on YouTube https://youtu.be/XiMguQXX-q0
    SELF-CARE:
Self-care – Self-care is especially important. I started to really pay attention to how I was taking care of myself and realized I was seriously lacking. We give 100% to our friends, family, career, etc. How much do we give to ourselves? I realized that in order to truly love myself, I had to take care of myself. That means something different to each of us. To me, that meant making an effort to take my makeup off every night, wash my face, and use moisturizer. I put serum on my eyelashes. Walking every morning and trying to work out on my lunch breaks are now a part of my regular routine. In addition to that, I try to get enough sleep. It is all a matter of finding out what it means for you.

We put time, energy, and money into so many things. We will spend money and time on maintaining our homes, our vehicles, our family, and more. Yet, why is it so difficult for us to spend time and money to better ourselves? We are happy to spend money on those we love, but not on the journey to love ourselves. Above all you are important enough to invest in! The journey to being able to fully love yourself will take time, money, and sometimes make you take a long hard look at things you might not want to. Once you do, you will never forget it! Check out Fabulously Single on Facebook to get more tips on self-love and how to love being single! https://www.facebook.com/fabulouslysinglelife/

Hopefully How To Begin Loving Yourself 5 Easy Steps has inspired you to begin your journey of self love. If it has, check out my blog Self Love http://www.fabulouslysingle.life/self-love/

Until next time…

Self Love

Self Love – Work To Love Yourself

What I Have Learned Being Single

Self love. Self love is something everyone talks about in today’s society, something that is promoted and desperately sought after. How many of us really deep down love ourselves and aren’t afraid to say it out loud? My own self-love is something I battle with constantly. I have been working on it regularly. I listen to daily affirmations every morning while getting ready, I stretch, workout, try my hardest to take care of myself, yet it still isn’t enough. So I did some research and bought a few books. I try to read a little bit each day. I bought the 21 day self-love challenge and I love it! The author starts out bluntly and sarcastically, which is right up my alley. I am still reading it, there is a lesson (only a page or so for each day). It really made me smile and start to change my attitude so I had to share it. I hope you love it as much as I do!

 

If you are interested in more great information on self love, come check out my blog: http://www.fabulouslysingle.life/how-to-begin-loving-yourself-5-easy-steps/

 

Why I had to travel alone to find myself

Why I had to Travel Alone to Find Myself

Why I Had To Travel Alone To Find Myself

We all know that itchy feeling of just needing to get away. Our lives are hectic, and our heads are filled with noise. Especially we women, it is ingrained in us to care for others. Well it is time we decide to make the effort to also care for ourselves. When is the last time you were still, or silent, or just alone? Furthermore, spending time with yourself is essential to knowing who you really are. This is why I had to travel alone to find myself.

I was sitting at work one day completely overwhelmed, with that itchy need to get away feeling and it hit me. I need to get out of here for a while. Immediately I went on line and started looking for a short weekend trip for me, myself, and I. Not only did I booked my flight and my hotel that same evening, I also booked a helicopter ride and a full day tour. I decided to take my first solo trip to Niagara Falls, Canada.

There sitting alone at dinner overlooking Niagara Falls, I decided I wanted to write a blog. I wanted to share things I have learned, struggles I have been through, and the fact that being single DOES NOT mean that you are alone, with other women. That moment changed me. I decided to get out of my comfort zone and pursue my desire to write my blog. I began Fabulously Single less than two weeks later.

Not only was this trip the beginning of this blog, it was the beginning of me taking the time to get to know myself. I have never felt so peaceful. There was no agenda, no schedule, nothing but my choices. That freedom was exhilarating. That quiet allowed me to get to know myself. I am usually very shy, but I spoke to more strangers then I can count. I went on a helicopter ride…and loved it. When you travel alone, you can chose to be whoever you want. I decided to be completely outgoing, funny, and brave. Yes, I have already started looking into my next solo trip.

There will be naysayers, there always are. Are you serious? You’re going alone? That’s weird. Aren’t you scared? The list goes on, ignore them. Do not let them diminish your excitement. You definitely want to take the time to research where you want to go. Make sure it is a safe destination for a woman to travel alone. It doesn’t have to be somewhere across the world, it can be to go to another sate. Rome wasn’t built in a day, take baby steps if that makes you more comfortable.

Traveling alone will give you a confidence you never dreamed was possible. Do you want to feel a major sense of accomplishment? Do you want to reconnect with yourself? Don’t think to hard, don’t second guess yourself. Book a flight and take yourself somewhere you have never been. You won’t regret it! Take this time to not just become comfortable with yourself, but to fall in love with yourself. Hopefully Why I Had To Travel Alone To Find Myself, inspires you to travel to find yourself!

My next blog will cover things you should know when traveling. Check out my photo gallery to see photos of where I have traveled. http://www.fabulouslysingle.life/photo-gallery/

 

https://www.pinterest.com/fabulouslysingle/fabulously-single/

 

Until next time…

Beauty Is In The Eye Of The Beholder

Beauty is in The Eye of The Beholder

Just as beauty is in the eye of the beholder, so is perception.  Recently I attended a wedding and I was very nervous. I hadn’t seen the majority of the people in attendance in years. My perception was that I was going to be judged for my life choices. At the forefront of those choices, still being single. Once I arrived my nerves gradually diminished. As I made my way around the room  everyone was genuinely happy to see me. There was no perceived judgment toward me. I must admit, I have a terrible fear of what others think of me. This is something I have been working on  for quite some time. This along with some other self growth journeys I will tell you about later.

One topic in particular is what really brought about the idea for today’s blog. A guy I went to school with from eighth grade through high school, made a comment that quite literally took me by surprise.  He started telling a story about how attractive I was back then, and that there were a list of guys who liked me. I was flabbergasted, as I always felt awkward and unattractive.  Never in a million years would I have guessed  that that was the case.

I guess what I am getting at here is that our perception of ourselves is often times not validated by anyone but ourselves.  Had I let my fear and nerves win, I never would have made my way around that room. I wouldn’t have had the opportunity to speak to so many wonderful people who were a big part of my young life. Most importantly, I wouldn’t have learned that they still loved me, no judgment.

As some of the most important people in my life tell me, what you are thinking others are judging you for is really your own fears causing you to judge yourself. We women have so much love in our hearts, lets make an effort to give some of that love to ourselves. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder, and we need to make an effort to see our own beauty. Please take the time to watch this amazing video below. Thank you all for allowing me to share with you! Until next time…